Elden Ring Fans Killing The Turtle Pope Horrifies The Internet

Pop Team Epic's Popuko holds a mallet above her head while staring at Elden Ring's Pope Turtle, Miriel.

A dramatic take on Turtle Pope’s final moments.
Picture: FromSoftware/Funimation/Sentai Filmworks/Kotaku

The dogs are good, even though they are shaped like a giant tortoise. However, the Middle Lands are an unforgiving place where boundaries are pushed and sacrifices must be made in the pursuit of knowledge to Ring of Elden players. Unfortunately, this knowledge cost Miriel, the life of the Vow Pastor. All because some people wanted the answer to the question, “What happens if you kill the turtle pope?”

Mirielalso known as “Turtle Pope”, is a soft-spoken turtle NPC who serves as the steward of the Church of the Vows. Although Miriel can’t leave the ruins of the church as her legs aren’t what they used to be, the mild-mannered turtle is more than willing to serve as a guide to players teaching them sorceries and incantations. Miriel also tells the player a bit about the lore of the world, while emphasizing her love of learning. He’s not the kind of character most people would attack. But people know that some NPCs from Ring of Elden drop items, some of which would otherwise be impossible to earn through quest lines. So curiosity exists, morbidly.

Youtuber pricewho posted a series of “what if” Ring of Elden videos, posted a minute-long video documenting their murder of Miriel. To add insult to injury, they did it using Emissary Horn. Warning: The following video contains video game turtle sniffer. Viewer discretion recommended.

Although this heinous act is a moral bankruptcy, killing Miriel leads to players getting Miriel’s Bell Rollan item that players can use to obtain items from the Twin maiden carcasses to Round table and – oh my god, 12 turtleneck meats.

After taking the brunt of a few brutal blows from a dastardly brass instrument, Miriel attempts to deter Prizzaa’s violent ways by telling them that her attacks are futile because her flesh feels like stone. His pleas fail to reach the YouTuber, forcing the wise turtle to retreat to the safety of his shell before continuing his assault.

“I can’t die, but I won’t hurt you either,” Miriel said. “Cease your useless efforts.”

But stop Prizzaa does not. The video then fast forwards through more vicious toots and bonks as Drowning Pool’s “Let the Bodies Hit the Floor” plays in the background. After delivering the killing blow, a high-pitched, haunting moan escapes Miriel’s (?) tortoise lips before he crosses the Rainbow Bridge into the sky. After pocketing Miriel’s item, Prizzaa then heads to a shrine in hopes of winning absolution, an act of forgiveness that, with the help of an additional item, sometimes leads to the resurrection of certain dead NPCs that have been attacked or killed. They don’t win any.

While some of their comment sections were appreciative of the knowledge they had gained from this little screwed up experience, a majority of viewers were understandably angsty and expressed their disgust for the war crime they had witnessed.

Behavior without maiden right here,” wrote Dazdrasen Constantine.

“It’s the most horrible thing I’ve seen Ring of Elden, and I’m at 130 hours,” said another commenter, probably referring to the fact that the game is full of terrible, indescribable things. It’s right up there with the Albinaurics, or whatever it is done in Raya Lucaria for the purposes of the investigation.

Prizzaa is not alone Ring of Elden player to display morally bankrupt behavior by causing the fan-favorite NPC to die. Truly, killing NPCs is, for some, an age-old tradition, but what sets this apart is how beloved the character is among the wider fandom. Redditor VG_Crimson took the r/Elden Ring yesterday to confess their sin, with the aptly titled post “I killed Pope Turtle, so you don’t have to.” VG_Crimson not only recounted Pope Turtle’s final moments, praises to him, in poignant detail, but also expressed his regret and shame for their “unnecessary” act of violence.

Halfway through the moans on the poor turf, they posted that Miriel remained as “good hearted” as he was before he was attacked. The Turtle even went so far as to promise that he won’t retaliate against VG_Crimson if they stop attacking him and that he won’t hold it against them.

“Bless his fucking soul, dogs truly are man’s best friend,” they said.

VG_Crimson admitted that the only reason they killed Miriel was their own morbid curiosity. A curiosity that they now regret having.

“You earn some turtleneck meats and his bell roll for buying whatever was available in his shop, but he’ll never ask you to learn together again,” VG_Crimson wrote. “You don’t get anything special and you lose the best place to deposit all your incantations/sorceries.”

One detail of their self-report on the turtle murder that will haunt me for the rest of my life is their interpretation of why they weren’t granted absolution after killing Meriel. According to VG_Crimson, absolution is not necessary because Miriel has already forgiven you and is doing so while you murder her. It’s hard.

“I have to live with this on my soul now, don’t do this,” they said. “There’s nothing to be gained, and you not only lose the convenience of him, but you also lose a part of yourself.”